Everyone else is more capable.
Everyone else is is having more fun.
Everyone else is making more money.
Everyone else is more loveable.
Everyone else is more loved.
I keep getting stuck in the story.
The story of Everyone else.
The story of more.
If I could only I could figure out
what keeps me from being
Everyone else.
If only I could figure out
the economy of more.
There I am, stuck in the story again.
Like an old truck that slid into the ditch
after 5 days of rain,
I keep rocking
back
and
forth
between
envy
and
shame.
The mud and the muck
suck the tires
down,
down,
down
until the axles feel
the wet embrace.
This back and forth only served
to make matters worse.
Finally,
I am faced with the question:
“Do I stay here, rocking myself
into a deeper embrace
of mud and muck,
or do I open the door
and
find another way?”
Today,
I choose
to open the door.
(If you are stuck in the story,
may you also find another way.)