Reflections
I should.
You should.
We should.
It’s a should-a-round.
“Should” lulls us into thinking we might actually
do something.
We get on and just keep circling,
going nowhere,
creating a deeper rut.
When we say “should,”
we really mean,
“It sounds like a good idea, but it’s not going to happen.”
When it comes to “should,” it’s actually “won’t”.
If you want to take action,
shun “I should”
and
master “I must”.
Stop circling
and start living.
Get off the should-a-round.
Lots of people have trouble saying,
“No.”
but only to others.
They say, “No” to themselves all the time.
No, I’m not good enough.
No, I’m not sexy enough.
No, I can’t ask for that raise.
No, I can’t risk it.
No one would understand.
And so they negate themselves.
They become a walking NO.
Imagine what would happen
if just one person began saying,
“Yes.”
Yes to themselves.
Yes to each day.
Yes to their
health,
relationships,
dreams.
Imagine what would happen if saying,
“Yes.”
meant they said,
“No.”
to their fears,
to their doubts,
to anything that didn’t help them say,
“Yes.”
to themselves.
Imagine that one person is you.
“Yes!”
When others let you down,
when they disappoint,
does it shatter your illusions,
dash your hopes,
do you think they missed the point?
When someone breaks your rules,
breaks a promise,
and leaves you feeling like a fool
are the times you find out
what’s true.
For the reality of disappointment is this;
it’s not about them.
It is about you.
These are the ingredients for
destroying relationships:
2 - Ears that don’t listen
1 - Mouth that keeps talking
1 - Mine vs. Yours mentality
Add to taste:
Put-downs
Sarcastic remarks
Having to be right
So unless that is
a cake you want to bake,
don’t begin mixing.
I knew a man once
who greeted everyone saying,
“I’m glad you’re here.”
His firm handshake
and the look in his eyes,
confirmed it was true,
made it clear.
Every time I saw him,
his greeting carried me
through the rest of the day.
And in those times I felt I didn’t belong,
it made me want to stay.
So many of us secretly wonder,
if anyone sees,
if anyone notices,
if anyone cares,
what if we told them,
“I’m glad you’re here.”
and left no question
hanging in the air?
Everyone has answers.
Answers get
sold like used cars,
whispered in your ear,
dangled like carrots
to take away your fear.
There are so many answers
coming at us quickly.
The videos,
the books,
the courses,
sold so slickly.
With all of these answers around
you would think
good feelings,
good health
and
great wealth
would abound.
But with all of these answers,
coming our way,
it’s easy not to choose,
to be afraid.
And so we get frozen,
forgetting that
the best answer
is the one
WE
have chosen.
We’ve been taught
to be cautious,
to be wary,
to read the fine print.
And we should.
“There is no free lunch.”
But what if
in our
life,
work,
relationships,
we gave no reason
for others to have
caution or wariness.
Imagine if
who we are
and
what we care about
were written in
bold print?
Not an
in your face, this is who I am
print,
but
clear,
unmistakeable,
straightforward.
No back door.
No escape clause.
Some will tell you it cannot be done,
that it makes you too vulnerable.
But who wants to go around squinting?
Live in bold print.
People will be suspicious
when you
give generously,
care deeply,
love freely,
and ask for nothing in return.
Do it anyway.
(It’s more fun than the alternative.)
Life not going as you planned
can open you to
a new awareness,
a determined resilience,
a renewed courage
or
you can
shrink down,
shut down,
stay down.
Your choice.
(And mostly life does not go as planned.)
